Geeky as it sounds, the reason I decided to come to Leeds uni in the first place was because of the Brotherton library. I was awestruck by its atmosphere, the beautiful interior design and its sheer size. Now of course, these things are completely taken for granted and all I see before me is the impossible number of shelves brimming with dusty books which have to be read. Added to which, after reading the creepy ghost stories from last week’s issue the majority of my time will now be productively spent freaking out instead of writing notes, let alone admiring the fancy bits of architecture. So, taking my former feelings for the classiest library on campus into account, and in the spirit of it being the Brotherton’s birthday and all, I shall leave the old fellow in peace and direct my ire towards sidekick Eddy B.
-The toilets are laid out in the most confusing way possible so that no one knows which is the male and which is the female toilet until the last second. The other day I started walking up one of the mini-corridors to the toilet only to see a guy walk out of the door. Thinking quickly in order to save myself any embarrassment, I pretended that I was headed for the lift opposite the toilet door and stood there waiting for him to get out of sight so that I could scuttle out and scoot round to the other side of Level 10. However, just before he’d left my peripheral vision the lift doors opened. Thank you, Sod’s law. With about four pairs of eyes on me, I was consequently forced to get into the lift and get transported very unwillingly back down to Level 9, where of course there are no toilets, meaning that I had to plod my way back up the stairs feeling like a bit of a plonker
-You are forced to choose between piercing the silence with either the crackle of a sandwich wrapper or your rumbling stomach
-I always put my student card the wrong way up at the entrance barriers. Yes, still
-I was informed whilst on my year abroad that there were beanbags in the library? I don’t see no beanbags. Gutted is not the word
-It is SO cold in there! Have they really resorted to literally freezing us to our seats in order to make us do work? What actually happens however is that I have to wear so many jumpers just to keep my body temperature at normal level that by the time I’m finished layering up I can barely move. Arms forced outwards penguin-style, not really the most practical situation for writing
-When your phone starts buzzing, you have to peg it from your window seat up the steps, dart your way strategically in and out of bookshelves, zoom out the doors and power walk until you reach a phone zone. By which time the person on the other end has hung up
So, a typical visit to Eddy B: After ten minutes of struggling to even get into the library I am sat on an uncomfortable chair with about ten missed calls, starving, wearing five jumpers and too worried to go to the loo lest I find myself in front of a urinal. This is not exactly a success, nor does it bode too well for final year studies…
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