Over the summer, four spooky things happened to me, all of the same nature. One day, I was chatting with my mum in the car and I wondered out loud why the moon was never big, red and as low in the sky as it is when you go abroad. That night, the moon was big and red. A couple of days later I drove past an old friend’s house and wondered how he was; that evening he randomly turned up at my front door. Not long after that, I went to another friend’s house and we started reminiscing about this guy we both used to fancy who worked in the summer activities week we helped out at when we were younger; the next day he parked his car alongside mine in town.
I only wish I’d been in possession of this apparent clairvoyance before going to uni. It might have saved me a lot of time and embarrassment knowing beforehand that:
-The word ‘lecture’ shares a suffix with ‘torture’ for a reason. Unless you are abnormally interested in the difference between and colon and a semi colon or the ins and outs of linear algebra, you will be checking the clock every five minutes, doodling your name and wondering whether the girl sitting next to you has green hair out of choice or as a consequence of a drunken forfeit
-Arriving late to lectures – not cool. No matter how horrendous it is actually responding to your alarm clock, it beats the impossibly loud creak of the auditorium door, 400 pairs of curious eyes on you and having to scuttle to one of the last few available seats, which are either right at the back which only prolongs the pain as people watch you until you have sat down, or right at the front meaning that you have to endure the glare of the lecturer whose class you disturbed for the next 40 minutes
-The Union bars open at 11am. Large glass of wine to go with your sausage and bacon butty after a difficult morning? Absolutely! It’s not alcoholism, it’s student living
-Knowing how to cook can come in handy – pesto pasta gets boring very quickly. Plus, using the orange juice in your vodka and orange as a vitamin source probably isn’t too healthy
-You should be prepared for seminars. Unless you are particularly adept at ad-lib and can do so with 15 expectant faces looking your way, do the preparation questions!
-There’s a bridge between Edward Boyle and the Roger Stevens building – who knew?! Oh, everyone? Just me then…
-Mastering the art of napping is essential. Spanish-ifying yourself and taking a little siesta during the day is a great way to recharge your batteries after an early start (or after doing nothing for the two hours you’ve been awake has completely worn you out)
-Budgeting is a must. Something I still haven’t mastered despite being in my final year, shown by the fact that when my brother did a budget spreadsheet for me over summer, I had a grand total of £10 a week to live on. Hello, bank of mum, long time no…oh wait
-The walls in student residences are paper thin. You may end up hearing a lot more than you want to such as Skype conversations, TV programmes, snoring and other – ahem – bed related activities. One word: earplugs
-You age 20 years in just one year at uni. Although we were going out three nights in a row during first year, in second year we find ourselves wondering how we did it as it becomes almost physically impossible
Hopefully this has rung a few bells and not just encouraged you to squander all your lecture time doodling or indulge in early morning drinking. While you mull this over, my clairvoyance skills and I shall be on our way to platform 9 and ¾…
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